Mr. Therapy tried to recover. "Well," he said, "I have to say that you two are really quite...different in your approaches to life." Duh. "May I ask, how have you been navigating those differences all these years?"
"Easy," I said, "We don't talk." Grasshopper nodded his head in agreement. We sat there expectantly, as Mr. Therapy got more and more agitated.
"Well, surely you two must talk about something. How about when you go out together?"
"We do not go out. I told you that already," I said. I was starting to get annoyed.
"Well, when you used to go out, then. Grasshopper, what did you talk about on a typical date?"
"Date? Who, her?" Grasshopper looked as puzzled as Mr. Therapy. "We never really dated in the way you mean."
Mr. Therapy frowned and said, "What way do I mean? A date is a date, when you and Ant would go out together and do something, just the two of you." His brow wrinkled and he almost scowled.
"We usually went out with a group of our friends," I expained. "Well, they're his friends now, but they used to be mine too, before we lived together." Mr. Therapy just looked at me, silently. I continued, "You know, like a bunch of friends hanging out together. We both do well in crowds." I looked at Grasshopper for confirmation, and he nodded again.
Mr. Therapy sighed heavily and said, "Well, the majority of your life together is not going to be in a crowd."
"Exactly," Grasshopper exclaimed, beaming.
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